Wednesday, August 28

I could never...

I talk to myself a lot. I do. Not out loud or anything (like someone I happen to love and live with) but I write, take notes, and have conversations with hypothetical people inside my head. 

As a side note, I can also write, take notes, and have conversations with hypothetical people inside my head all while reading out loud to my kids without missing a beat.  If you were to ask me a question about what I'd just read out loud in a moment of mental multi-tasking, I probably wouldn't be able to answer you. I have to focus with all my might to pay attention to what I'm reading. Strange, but true.

Moving right along.


Today you have been granted access into one of those conversations I have with myself. It's one I've written about before, so you might recognize it. But it bears repeating. It's the same, only different.

The internal dialog begins whenever I utter this statement myself, or when I hear someone else say:
 "Oh, I could n e v e r  _____________."

That blank could be filled with anything you'd like. Let's look at a few examples, so you get what I'm talking about:

I could never send my kids to that school.
I could never be a public speaker.
I could never love an adopted child like I would my own.
I could never handle my husband being deployed.
I could never have that many kids.
I could never stay in a marriage like that.
I could never be a stay at home mom.
I could never live without running water.
I could never homeschool my kids.
I could never be an overseas missionary.
I could never have a baby in my forties.
I could never leave my kids and join the workforce.
I could never parent a child with special needs.

We get the picture, don't we? I'd venture to guess that you have your own "I could never" list. I know I've had mine.

The thing is this:  You could. If you were called to it.

So maybe doing the things that scare us (because really that's what this is all about) won't seem so scary when we know God is writing the script. He's doing it for us and for them.

Even though we understand the concept of God's call on a person's life, we sometimes still forget that it isn't going to look just one way. We forget that the woman returning to work when she has babies at home might be called there. The friend who decides to put her kids into a public school after years at private school may very well be called too.

We don't need to know the details surrounding every decision people make. But what we can do, is trust our fellow believers have bathed their decision in prayer, and are walking according to what God has for them.

If aspects of another's life looks strange or impossible, it's probably because it would be for us at that time.

But for her? She's super-powered. God is fueling her fire, fanning diligently to keep it burning. The days aren't always rosy, and the glass seems to be half-empty at times.

Even though it's not always pretty, it sure is beautiful. Those women, you, and me walking in faith and moving into the role God wrote for us.

You were not called for my purpose, and neither was I called for yours. And we certainly weren't called to walk in God's purpose for her. The role we're called to play is written just for us. I don't know what could be more inviting than that.

4 comments on "I could never..."
  1. Amanda. It is so true. I love what you write about. So good.

    1. Thank you, Miss Michelle! Time at the lodge winding down?

  2. I love this. { Also? I have conversations in my head and can also read to my kids while my brain is multi-tasking. It sort of drives me crazy about myself. : ) Oh, to be single-focused! }

    We probably have a whole list of "never's" in our minds. Personally, I have lived through or am currently living through several of my own "never's." And I wouldn't change any of them, that's the crazy part.

    Great post, my friend.

  3. This is a great post.

    When I was pregnant with AJ, we had a "scare" on the ultrasound that he might have Down Syndrome. I remember praying that AJ would be ok. My husband (wise as he always is) told me that he would be ok whether he had Down Syndrome or not. After a few more ultrasounds, the risk was reduced and AJ was born without Down Syndrome.

    However, as you probably know from Facebook, AJ was diagnosed at age 3 with autism. If you had asked me before I was pregnant, even during my pregnancy, I would have told you I could not parent a child with special needs. I practically prayed against it. But God called me to be AJ's mom, and with that calling also came the calling to be an advocate for other children and families with special needs. I would *never* have imagined doing this or being the person I am today, but it is who God prepared me to be, and I wouldn't change it at all.

    Thanks again, Amanda.


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