hello, New Year. a time for releasing and embracing.

Well, here we are. 2015! I don't know if I've ever been so happy to see a brand-new year arrive. Is anyone else with me? 2014 was a year for the books. Last year brought the highest of highs. Some of the most tangible overwhelming God-is-SO-real-and-personal moments happened last year. But there were also the lowest of lows. The lowest of my life.

But you know? I wouldn't trade the lessons learned or the grace received for anything. But still, I'm ready for something new.

Of course nothing has really changed, it's just a figurative change as we hang new calendars and the dial rolls to 2015. We're all still walking through our days one after the other in a grand succession, but it just feels different rolling into January, doesn't it?

How about we share a bit about what we're looking forward to embracing in 2015, and what we're looking forward to leaving behind in 2014? I'll go first. Please share anything you're willing to share with the rest of us in the comments.

In Ephesians 4:22, Paul encourages, "put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life ...". Each moment of every day breeds opportunity to put off our old self, but we seem to be most aware of our need for change this time of year. And that's okay. No matter what time of year we choose to purge old behaviors, habits, or ways of life -- it's always a good time. As believers we should always be growing. And usually growing means changing. So what is it we're needing to release this year, so the good kinds of change can take place? I can think of a few things for myself. By God's grace, I will be able to:

• Charge my phone and iPad in the kitchen overnight. I've gotten in a unhealthy routine of reaching for a device in the morning before getting out of bed instead of reaching out in prayer or for my Bible. For me, this has to stop. I want to make sure I'm connecting with God before I'm connecting any part of me with anyone else.
• Lose the obsession with others' opinions of me. Even though I'm strong in my beliefs and fully dedicated to the work God has set before me, sometimes I struggle with how I'm perceived by other women. Even though I only want to be living for an audience of one. This is something I'm carrying over from a work that was started in my heart in back in 2013.
• Rather than grab for a device out of boredom or avoidance, do something intentional instead. I can think of several things and most importantly people who are needing my attention. Or if a breather is what I really need, I'll look to do that in a way that feeds my soul. To help, I've removed the Facebook app from my devices as well. Out with the old!
• Lose the obsession with self. I love how author Tim Keller puts in my favorite little book, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, "The thing we would remember from meeting a truly gospel-humble person is how much they seemed to be totally interested in us. Because the essence of gospel-humility is not thinking more of myself or thinking less of myself, it is thinking of myself less." This year, I seek to think of myself less.

 If we were to continue in Ephesians 4, right after the putting off the old part, we run right into the good part in verses 23-24: "to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness." This sounds much more fun. But the other stuff is necessary so we can truly embrace the new. So what do you sense God is asking you to embrace this year? Here's my list. By God's grace, I will be able to:

• Thrive and just breathe in the midst of a big change in our schooling ways. As I mentioned in this post over at The Masterpiece Mom a few weeks ago, our family has been facing some major change in the way we educate our kids. Starting next week, all three of our elementary-aged kids will be attending the same small charter school. The middle school-aged boys will remain at home, along with our three preschoolers. This is a huge stretch for us in our tenth year of homeschooling. But it's the right move for us, for right now. We've gotten that message loud and clear from the Lord. So no matter how bumpy or unsettling at times, I'm going to embrace the gift that it truly is.
• Live fearlessly. No matter what God calls me to, I want to follow by faith. His ways are so high, and His plans SO good. I've learned He can be trusted with absolutely any and every area of my life. It's so freeing. You should try it.
• Write in a journal. I write stuff down all the time. I'm a big fan of to-do lists and filling in squares on a fresh calendar page. And since I'm a writer, I spend a lot of time tapping out words on my laptop.  But the one sort of writing I'm really missing in my life is the kind that isn't for a purpose or an audience. It's more for the purpose of emptying this fast-moving, jump-around-y brain of mine. 
• Read more books. See bullet point number three in the releasing section up above. Rather than reaching for a device, I'll seek to reach for a paperback. I have several going at all times. I'd really love to finish a few.
• Be unashamedly me. For years I've sort of hidden parts of me from my friends and other people in my life that I thought were too different or strange. I don't want to do that anymore. I want to be fully me, walking into the calling God has placed on my life. With every passing year, I'm getting closer and closer to the place He's been leading me to all along. May 2015 be no different.
• Soak up God's Word. Have I ever told you I've become obsessed with studying the Bible? For my birthday back in July, I requested this ginormous Bible commentary that I absolutely love. I'm so happy to get to spend the rest of my life at this pursuit, and then turn around and teach what I've absorbed to women wherever the Lord may lead.

Happy New Year to you. I truly mean that. I'll be praying for us as we purge the old and welcome the new. There truly is no better feeling.

So what sort of things will you be releasing and embracing as you walk into 2015?

 

 

JOY. The gift and the battle.

 

Joy. It's everywhere you look at Christmastime.

The songs sing it. The people speak it. Our hearts expect it.
We're joyful at the coming of Christ. Because Christ is Joy. Salvation is joy.

Days of celebration often make it easy to be joyful. There are people to see, gifts to unwrap, goodies to munch, and moments to remember.

But the joy that hovers on the most mundane of days can be harder to grab onto. These types of days aren't exciting. Just normal. Things and people frustrate, cars won't start, and then someone throws up through the night leaving you an exhausted heap by morning.

Joy. It's an every day choice.

I set my alarm for 6:30 on this, the first official day of Christmas vacation because I had great plans to get up, and start my morning routine. The one I've been trying to start since September. Ahem.

I complete the most important part of it every day. Bible reading, prayer, getting dressed... you, know, the key stuff. But there's another part that when added to the routine, makes me come alive in a different sort of way.

But something always stands in the way of me taking this time for myself. Usually that something is me. I stay up too late, or hit snooze 17 times, or feel stiff and cruddy when I first wake up making it hard to get out of bed.

Once I realize I've missed my chance again, I feel behind already when the day hasn't really begun. And I feel a little off. Like there's a battle for joy being fought on the battlefield of my heart.

Because there is.

@holleygerth on Instagram

Today I got out of bed at 7:45, which still left me with 45 minutes of alone time before the kids would arrive in the kitchen. But the baby who normally wakes around 8:30 or 9:00 was already wailing. Because she wakes up like a firecracker. This blue-eyed baby of mine.

I quickly take her a bottle, which will buy me a few minutes to at least get dressed before seeing a little person earlier than I'd planned.

I chose joy in the moment, reveling in the one-on-one time with this little one.

Phew. I made it across one intersection smoothly.
But the next crossroads I would face would tell a different story.

 

Enter six more kids. And breakfast for many and a mom who has yet to brush her teeth. Or have food or coffee.

Then add in several lies told by the same child, some poop in the bathtub (yes, poop in the bathtub), and a pan full of burnt eggs. And you get a mama who is plopped smack in the middle of a battlefield fighting for joy. I ache for joy, I cry out for joy. But still, even still - I don't always chose it.

It's a fight. A daily battle. If someone tells you they don't have to fight for joy? They're lying to you.

Because heaven is the only place filled with unstoppable joy. Unending joy that fills to overflowing. But on that morning in the manger, all those years ago, Mary gave birth to Unending Joy. Joy came down into the world as a gift for all of us. But only those who would believe would unwrap it. Unending joy would be theirs too. Forever. But first we must live here. Among the mess and the muck; the struggle and the sin. The lives we try so hard to make joyful and pleasant can get bogged down and become joyless, because well, we're still here. But because He lives in us - we are gifted with Him. And He is Joy.

"And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord." Luke 2:10-11

Even with all of this Joy that has come to us and lives in us, we will have trouble. We will have to fight for joy in these earthly shells. But His presence is with us.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”  John 16:33

Every time you want to pound the floor in despair, curl up in a ball under the covers, bah humbug your circumstances or everyone else's happy, don't forget to forget yourself.

“The really wonderful moments of joy in this world are not the moments of self-satisfaction, but self-forgetfulness. Standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon and contemplating your own greatness is pathological. At such moments we are made for a magnificent joy that comes from outside ourselves.”
―    John Piper, Don't Waste Your Life

Because that joy comes from outside ourselves,

even when life's a mess and there's poop in the bathtub, we can rejoice.

Even if you're forgetful and the pan full of eggs are burnt, we can rejoice.

"Struggling and rejoicing are not two chronological steps, one following the other, but two concurrent movements, one fluid with the other. As the cold can move you deeper toward the fire, struggling can move you deeper toward God, who warms you with joy. Struggling can deepen joy. Even though. Even now."  Ann Voskamp, The Greatest Gift

Good news from heaven the angels bring,

Glad tidings to the earth they sing:

To us this day a child is given,

To crown us with the joy of heaven.

- Martin Luther

Obsessed

Maybe you're one of the 16.7 million people who have already watched this. But just in case you're not, here you go.

I'm so in love with their rendition of this song, and have watched or listened to it more times than I can count. Wow. Wow. Wow.

They have an entire Christmas album. Isn't that exciting?

I just wouldn't be a good friend if I kept this to myself.

Thankful and Still

Today is Thanksgiving Day. And we're home being still. It's weird to not be having the traditional dinner or be in a house filled with the sights and sounds of Thanksgiving. And loads of loved ones.

But it's wonderful just being quiet today too. Jeremy has been working overtime since September, and I've missed him so much. We've all missed him. Four days together is just glorious, and it's rather wonderful this year to not be having the normal Thanksgiving festivities on Thanksgiving.

We'll be hosting a traditional dinner with all the trimmings tomorrow night with family and friends. And I can't wait. It is pretty much my favorite day of the year. But it's lovely to have this day to pause.

If I could only say one thing today, I'd say I'm thankful.
Of course.

{Story Photographic} by Carly Webber

If I had nothing but Jesus and the hope of heaven, It'd be enough. I pray my heart's stance would stay the same if it ever came to that.

Because it is everything.

“...life change comes when we receive life with thanks and ask for nothing to change.”   - Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts

After all God has done for us through His son, Jesus, I can't believe He continues to give gifts. Amazingly good gifts.

The Holy Spirit.
Family.
Marriage.
Children.
Friendships.
Hardships. They help me see my need for a Strong One to lean on.

“The practice of giving thanks...eucharisteo...this is the way we practice the presence of God, stay present to His presence, and it is always a practice of the eyes. We don't have to change what we see. Only the way we see.”  

Church body.
Ministry.
Home.
Food.
Health.
Sickness. It helps me feel small, because I am after all.

“How my eyes see, perspective, is my key to enter into His gates. I can only do so with thanksgiving. If my inner eye has God seeping up through all things, then can't I give thanks for anything? And if I can give thanks for the good things, the hard things, the absolute everything, I can enter the gates to glory. Living in His presence is fullness of joy- and seeing shows the way in.” 

 

Giftings.
Time.
Love.
Delight.
Peace.
Joy.
Growth.
The Word.
Change. This helps me trust.

“We only enter into the full life if our faith gives thanks. Because how else do we accept His free gift of salvation if not with thanksgiving? Thanksgiving is the evidence of our acceptance of whatever He gives. Thanksgiving is the manifestation of our Yes! to His grace.”

Happy Thanksgiving, friends.

Maybe you'll join me as I read through Ann Voskamp's new advent devotional book, The Greatest Gift, this December? We start December 1st.

7 Ways to Serve as a Family During the Holidays

Good Morning! I'm pleased to be sharing ways to serve as a family during the holidays over at The Homeschool Classroom! Won't you join me there today?

What April brought

 

 

Siting here at the end of the month of April finds me wondering where it went.  It came in with a huge snowfall and is going out with sun and the return of canadian geese, sandhill cranes, and ducks. 

 

April also brought celebrations! 

In a ten day span, we celebrated Gabrielle's adoption day, Levi's adoption day, and Gabrielle's 3rd birthday.  Three huge reasons to get our happy on.   

 

 

 

April also brought the realization that I'm an artist.  Not a paint a beautiful picture artist - I'm an artist of a different kind.  I learned that I need to fight to make art, not just wait until the opportunity grabs ahold of me.  So I've been making time by getting up earlier and working when the family dynamic allows, and am so content when I'm creating my art.  I don't have to hold all that creative down inside.  God gave me gifts that are different than your gifts...  and your gifts are different than mine. 

 

Do you make time for your art?

 

 

 

April also brought about a change in my mothering. 

I've been working to shower my kids (toddlers especially) with love of the unconditional variety.  They need love, hugs, sweet words, discipline, and my love; no matter what. 

 

I can't control them, but I can control me.  So I'll stick to that. 

 

The school year is winding down, and so is my resolve.  My brain checks out, as I dream of green grass, picnics, walks, and freckles.  I can do this - we can do this - just a few more weeks and it'll be on to the dreamy stuff. 

Good day to you all...  I'll be ushering in the month of May with my sister, niece, Emmalie, and a group of friends at a much-anticipated conference this week.  I hope to check in from there, but until then.... 

Annika, the birthday girl!

 

 

 

Our sweet and hilarious, Annika Scarlet is now 5 years old! 

 

She is such a little light in our family life. 

 

We love you!

Christmas Joy part 1

This Christmas was so wonderful.  We had lots of precious time spent with family from near and far.  This was the year for Jeremy's entire immediate family to be here for Christmas! 

Here are some photo highlights of our time together with family this Christmas season...

Loving on each other's babies was a hightlight for sure.  Here, Abie (our sister in law and Aaron's wife) holds her Katie and our Emmalie. 

We had some professional photos taken of the whole gang at Grandma and Grandpa's house while we're all together, here is our side view version!  Here is Jeremy, our brother in law Gerry, Jeremy's dad David, our brother in law Jimmy, and Jeremy's younger brother Aaron. 

11 Grandkids!

Back row:  Gavin, Anita, David, Annika
Middle row:  Dylan, Aidyn, Emmalie, Elias
Front row:  Drew, Levi, Katie, Morgan, Gabrielle

On Christmas Day, as has been tradition the last two Christmases (two years ago and now) when we're all together, we spent 3 days up at a Bible Camp, renting cabins and meeting room/kitchen for fun and games and uninterrupted time together!  Here is the two and three year old crowd out on a walk with me. 

It is wonderful to not get cell service, not have internet, and not having anything pressing to do and just be together.  We'd highly recommend it.  Plus, the fun to be had sledding, snow machining, playing games, watching movies, and eating is unsurpassed!

Heather (Jeremy's youngest sibling) and Eli

Jimmy, Jennifer (Jeremy's oldest sibling), and Aidyn

It's super fun when uncles are willing to be silly and play Dazzling Princess with the girls! 

 

sweet Katie

Singing Happy Birthday to Jesus with Grandma! 

... and then praying to give Jesus a gift from their hearts.

 

 

 

What a gift from God this time together was.  We miss then all so much!  And are so thankful to connect all together in the same state. 

 

 

my kind of cookies

A couple weeks ago, I invited our neighbor over to do something crafty or food related with the kids and I.  She loves to bake with kids, and we just hadn't had the chance to make that happen!  We picked the day, and she wondered if we'd want to make sugar cookies and that she'd make the dough...  I immediately agreed that we would, since me and sugar cookie dough don't mix.  I don't ever plan ahead enough time to let the dough refridgerate, or maybe I'm just too impatient to get the show on the road.  So I never make them.  She volunteered to make the dough and bring it over all ready with her when she came. 

The day arrived, and our dear neighbor showed up on our doorstep with cookie cutters and dough in had, but was feeling too sick to stay.  Sad!  But this mama was so thankful to be able to jump right into a fun activity with the kids (while the littles were napping.)  We rolled and we cut and we baked those yummy cookies right up.  Then the next day all of the kids, littles included, got to frost and sprinkle to their heart's content.

It was Gabi and Levi's first cookie decorating experience.  I'd say they liked it.  And I liked this sugar cookie dough being delivered to my front porch business as well. 

I'm linked up today! Go to Chatting at the Sky's Tuesdays Unwrapped: HERE.

 

 

o felt Christmas tree, o felt Christmas tree...

 

We were gifted this fun felt tree and ornaments last week, and the toddler crowd has been having a blast with it!  A sweet friend of ours made it for us - we have nothing like it, and it adheres to the wall with velcro command strips which come right off the wall when we're done for the season. 

 

Finally, ornaments Gabi and Levi can take on and off all they want!